Monday, October 6, 2008

The Lead In...

The lead in is the back story of how Rob and I met.
If you would have asked me 18 years ago who I wanted to marry I would have told you 2 things:
#1 Joe McIntyre (Of New Kids On The Block)
#2 Johnny B. (my high school sweetie of 7 years!)


Neither one of those worked out. Young love, so innocent.

I went out to Boston. I was a nanny.

I found myself, I also found a bit of summer fun. It wasn't meant to be either. (Boston is a story for another time...)

I longed to be wanted, cherished. Every girl does right?

Then came "Ramon".

He was my "project". I could change him right?

NO. I had to get a cat to get rid of him.


Young, naive and lonely I fell for "Mr. Liar Liar pants on fire!" See, he told me this sob story of how he was getting divorced.
I know I should have been smarter than that. I wised up quickly and NEVER looked back.
I was starting to feel like an old maid!


Next we have "ISH".

He was smarmy, smooth, ishy. I was easy prey. He wanted what ishy men want...He talked about wanting to get married, I was yet another test drive. I knew ONE thing. ISH wasn't what I wanted.

I wanted commitment, forever, I was not going to settle for whatever was offered. But WHAT exactly was marriage material?


I longed to be CHERISHED. (I didn't know Christ yet, he came later too.)
So how DO you know what is right?
I spent too many dates wondering is this the "right" guy?
Time and again my answer was no, sometimes it took a long time to "get" it.
I have Daddy issues. He didn't make me feel safe and loved. He proved to be selfish and mean.
I have Mother issues. We don't see eye to eye. She runs a pageant.

And all my life, I have felt, if only I had a crown to wear, she would love me. (That's me second row, second from left. I put myself through this torture not once but 3 times! I did win Miss Congeniality once though.)

This is the lead in...tomorrow I will take you on a journey God had planned for me, my whole life long and it was up to me how the story went!

*Side Note* As I'm looking back at these pictures, I notice how obscenely happy I look. Oh, how hard I tried to be happy with what I had. I could even fake myself out.

It sad to see. I wish I could go back and tell that sweet young women to hold on and for Goodness sake,hold out for more!

14 comments:

  1. Oooh, this is gonna be good. Can't wait to hear the rest!

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  2. I'm going to stalk your blog until you tell us the story. So it is totally your fault if my bathrooms don't get cleaned. :o)

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  3. Jenny (family tree gal)October 6, 2008 at 7:24 AM

    Nothing like leaving us hanging! However, I think that I may have a an inkling as to what happened next ... (smile!) I'll keep quiet! LOL!

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  4. Oh how I know how you feel about looking over the relationships of the past. Looking for love in all the wrong places comes to mind...
    Can't wait to read the rest!

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  5. You're speaking my language. I wanted everything a Godly man had to offer, but I didn't know God! So really, I looked for love in all the wrong places. Can't wait for the next chapter; I'm with Gwendolyn - the bathrooms may have to wait, LOL. Blessings, Whitney

    PS, I Love that you coordinated your music to your post; I do that all the time too!

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  6. THANKS Whitney! I spent hours on playlist...just ask my hubby! Awesome you noticed. That makes it all worth it!

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  7. as hard as it is to look back sometimes, it is SO GOOD to. i've done that journey back about the guys in my life. and the one i almost married. phew, i'm so grateful God intervenes when i make foolish mistakes!

    can't wait to hear more!

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  8. I love a good story. I am looking forward to the rest and I am glad that it has a happy ending. I was just thinking, I have no idea how I found your blog or you found mine??? I can't seem to find a connection yet but I am glad it happened.

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  9. What a lead-in...wow! You have quite a story to tell! It is so compelling to hear people's testimonies, to hear how they attempted to fill a spot that only Jesus can fill. Thank you for being willing to share your journey, thank you for being transparent. I can't wait to hear the rest of this tale--I'm going to assume you ended up with the King of Kings and Prince Charming!

    So glad you came by my place today! So appreciate your comments!

    Blessings!

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  10. Wow - I can't wait to read the rest!

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  11. Love this.

    Thank God for not allowing me to marry the ones that I originally thought were "the ones." Man, I was an idiot. Thanks again, God.

    Anyway, love the pics. And I think we all have Daddy and Mommy issues, some worse than others. I know I do.

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  12. I can't wait to see the post tomorrow.
    My heart goes out to you! I had mommy and daddy issues too...but God used them to make me a wonderful wife and mother!
    Isn't God awesome! Amazing how he can take something horrible and turn it into beauty!

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  13. i want to know more too!and i commend you for being so open!

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  14. Just starting in on story. I'm so excited to get to the rest! :)

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