Wednesday, April 22, 2009

The one about Flip flops.

YEAH! It's here flip flop season!
Linda was so sweet to organize a swap among bloggy friends.
I hesitated. Swaps and I aren't friends.
My feet and I aren't either.
See, shoes are hard to find for me. I have bunions. Can't wear heels. They cause sheer pain, especially after my surgery to "fix" the bunion.
I also have wide feet. Which makes finding shoes that don't pinch and squeeze difficult.
I thought I'd be safe with flip flops. They have one ginormous strap, how simple a shoe.
Kelly @ this andthat was my partner.
It was fun shopping for Miss Kelly. You can see the shoes I picked for her here.
She did a wonderful job finding ones for me.
They are purple! My favorite color.
They are patterned. In this case paisley.
But they also pinch the tops of my feet. The strap is too tight, I tried walking around the house in them and got red welt indents.
Did I happen to say how much I HATE my feet.
There are so many things I can't do or wear because of them. I feel bad for my children.
Kelly, I want to thank you for going over the top with these adorable flip flops, I'm so sorry they didn't work.
Now I'd like to tell you about round two of my encounter with the mail carrier.
Kelly paid a hefty price to get those cute flip flops to me on time, which meant that they wouldn't fit in my box and I had to sign for them.
I hear a faint knock at the door.
I wasn't sure it was the door, I'm used to the kids banging stuff. I hear Roo shout "Mommy, someone heer rrrr."
I'm standing strak naked having just gotten out of the shower, I check out the window. No car in the driveway but the mail truck is sitting across the street and I know my flops are coming...
I throw on whatever is laying around and bolt for the door.
He is down the driveway ready to cross the street.
"I'm coming! Hold On!" I shout.
He had to stop, there was a car coming. (Thank goodness for a busy street)
"I can't wait for you." He grumbles.
I look him dead in the face and say " What, you have more balls to buy?"
We stared each other down.
I hold out my hand and he slaps the green envolope on it.
"You need to sign and print."
I do and as I'm doing so, I ask about my other mail.
"Where's the rest?"
"You'll get the rest at your regular time." He smirks.
I grab hold of the signed slip and tell him.
"Great, You'll get this at the normal time too. Why'd you bother stopping now, were you hoping I wasn't home so you could turn it in as undeliverable? Scared you'd be late making it back and I could PROVE you don't drop off the mail until after 5PM?"
He just glared at me.
"Mam, you can't keep that slip..."
"And you sir should try being a bit nicer. I've done nothing to you and all I get from you is attitude. THIS is your job. I see how you drive this route, I know your haunts and how much time you spend lolly gaging. Not delivering mail like your suppose to. There is NO reason my mail shouldn't be in that box before 4PM. I'd even say before noon. You do the other side at 10:30AM! And here we stand at 10:33AM, haggling about slips and the rest of my mail. Seriously, you will get your slip when I get the rest of the mail."
I turned and walked up the driveway and barely made it inside, he was there with the rest of my mail.
I politely handed him the slip and wished him a good day.
I sware that man is such a turd.
I've already called on him several times and each time I call he gets later and later with the mail.
I'm pretty sure he wasn't happy with me today.
I'm thinking I might find my box blown up after this.
And now I can't wait to see everyone's FLIP FLOPS!!!!!!!!
Thanks LINDA!


  1. Such a bummer they didn't work for you! They are so cute - and really look like you.

    I love flip flops and wish I would've explored that flip flop button on your side bar sooner. :) I would've loved to have done this!

  2. man, that mailman doesn't know who he's messing with! bummed you can't wear these but maybe you can bop him upside the head with them instead....oh my word, did i just say that? TERRIBLE of me. JUST KIDDING people!!

  3. those are so cute...I am sorry you can' wear them!

    LOL on the mailman!! I know it is frustrating to you, but it makes me laugh reading it! Picturing you out there nose to nose with the mailman!!

  4. aw, man! i am so sad you can't wear them. i feel so bad! i got them at Target, if you'd like to return them. i'm not sure i still have the reciept (again, sorry!) otherwise i could send that to you. i hope you can find some you can wear/use. what a bummer!!!!

    and NUTS to that mailman! he is such a grump!!!!!

  5. Oh my gosh, that is too funny! Good for you for sticking up for yourself!

  6. Wow, remind me to never get on your bad side. Way to go to call him at his own game!

  7. Now those are some CUTE flip-flops (my fave color too!) I saw that Kelly said she got them at Target - I bet you could return them even without a receipt. I know they can be stinkers about that sometimes, but I just returned a hat with no receipt, and they didn't hassle me.

  8. Mail men need to toe the line!! The Post Office is really close to becoming outdated and no longer necessary!


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