Prom {circa 1990~1991}

I like Spring for many reasons:

1. The end of winter, cold weather...snow
2. The cherry blossom trees, crab apple trees, lilac bushes
3. Flowers put of porches and steps
4. Flip flops make their appearance again.
5. Prom season...

 

Prom is a right of passage, it can be one of the best experiences or worst. I was lucky to have dated an upper class man, which meant I went to prom as a sophomore. I was so entirely awkward at this age. I had braces and glasses and I thought I was so together.

Especially since I snagged such a sweetheart of a first love.

I've told this story a few times, we met because our lockers were next to each others, we were both new to the district, so grade meant nothing in terms of where our lockers were, normally they have you in alphabetical order in grade 9, 10,11 &12. Newbies all go into the same section.

Conversation:

"Gosh you're tall! Who are you?" ~me

"I'm John, and you're short!" ~him

Friendship started.

Yes, I did think he was cute, not hot but cute and really really tall, like he could carry me around like a teacup poodle tall!

We became such good friends over that first year we began dating right before the start of school his Junior year, my sophomore.

We got teased, as you can imagine. Didn't bother me...I thought the attention was fun, better then the last school I was at.

John never really asked me to prom, it was just kind of assumed since we were dating and prom was coming up we were going together. I think he called one night saying something like:

"So Prom?  Do I buy the prom tickets or are you going to get them?"

"No, you buy them, I find the dress and match your tie and cumber bun."

And so it went, I went dress shopping, I had no idea what I was looking for...until I saw it.

Black with polka dots. I was in love, my mom was in shock at the price. I was devastated to leave there without that dress! I worked my butt off babysitting to earn the rest of the money for this dress, when I went back to get it it was gone, thankfully they called around and found my size at another store and had it shipped in. I would have not gone, I was so in love with this dress! I had found his tie and cumber bun, white with black polka dots to match...

 

 This is one of my favorite pictures. It says a lot about each of us, and that first blissful year of dating.

He had such beautiful hair. I can't even tell you! Feathered and long, baby-soft curls in the back! Oh, be still my beating heart! He aways looked at me like that, like I was a gem that he admired. Much like the way Hubby looks at me now. 

You can't really tell from these pictures, but even my nylons had little tiny black dots on them!

 Oh, yes, and "the Ride", yeah, I knew I was going in a limo, we barely had enough money for the dance, dress and dinner! We took his parents little red 1985 Pontiac Sunbird. You can see the height difference here, I was barely a whispered breath over 5 feet, he is 6'6".  We went to the Venetian Inn for Italian. It was the fanciest place we'd ever been and the food wasn't that great, of course I don't know why I picked spaghetti!
Our theme song was "Without You" ~ Motley Crue
Yes, cheesy.
We spent most of the dance watching people, John would only dance to slow songs, and finally they played one he agreed to dance to because it only required him to shake his butt...can you guess the song?
(Da Butt) by E.U  ready for these lyrics?
Yeah, yeah, yeah...

 

 

Walked in this place
Surprised to see
A big girl getting busy
Just rocking to the go-go beat

 

 

The way she shook her booty
Surely looked good to me
I said, come here, big girl
Won't you rock my world
Show that dance to me

 

 

(CHORUS)
She was doing the butt
Hey, pretty, pretty
When you get that notion
Put your backfield in motion, honey
Doing the butt
Hey, sexy, sexy
Ain't nothing wrong if you
Wanna do the butt all night long

 

Classy, I know.

We had a good time with each other but learned a valuable lesson, it's more fun to go as a group!
We took that to heart the next year, which was John's senior prom, my junior...which meant my class would be there too. John was coming off a stellar basketball season, so he was a big cheese at school.
We weren't together exclusively anymore, but still hung out quite a bit, which meant he got a lot of offers to prom. He turned them all down and asked me. I wasn't shocked, I knew for him it was a comfort level thing, he didn't want pressure to impress some girl when all he needed was ask me and I'd be easy, just take me. I didn't hold my breath for Tom M or Justin S to ask me, I mean just because I gave them pencils in class most everyday because the never went to their lockers; didn't mean they knew my name or cared that I dreamt of them asking me to prom and would have *died* if they had.

I decided to go with him out of comfort and knowing what to expect. This time we talked some friends into going too. None of us were "couples" but we went coupled together, with no romantic pressure.
I wanted to have a more "sophisticated" look this year, I mean, polka dots are so "first time prom"!
I found this white dress that had pearly sequins on it that brought out just a touch of pink. I didn't really have to convince John to wear a pink tie and cumber bun, he would do whatever I asked.

  

If 1990 prom was on pennies, 1991 prom was on twenties! Since we were going with a group we did the limo thing, meeting at one person's house and all the parents gathering for pictures. Oh, so tacky and yet a total right of passage moment! This is one of my favorites of John and I, again candidly, who we are together. My hand was always on his leg, and to keep his hands off my head, I made him keep them on his hips! He walked around like that, because he was afraid he'd ruin my hair! I'm laughing at him, because he had just said to me: "I'm gonna ruin your hair! I look like a dork, and I just can't keep my hands away from your head."
(You know how basketball players "palm" the ball in one hand? That was John's version of a love tap...he'd palm my head and I would touch his leg...holding hands meant my arm being half way up in the air)
The song for Prom 1991 was: 'When I see you Smile'
John was more in the mood to dance since we had a big group to be apart of.

Here it is the official prom photo.

 

Oh geez, I look so young here. I remember feeling old, like blink and this will be our wedding old!

I was allowed to stay out until 2:30am after prom we all went back to on of the girls house and watched movies. There was no hanky panky what so ever, being friends...the next day we all went to an amusement park where I got sick on several rides. John being the nice guy he was, hung back with me and making sure I was okay.

I will never forget prom(s). I did not attend my senior prom. Several things changed:

1.  Our school paired up with a rival school to share the cost of being at a fancier place. Which sucked. It was over priced and who wants to share a prom with a rival school??  What ever happened to decorating the gym?
 
2. John did not want to go to prom again, ahem, senior prom was so beneath a graduate!
 
3.  I could not imagine going with anyone but John, and turned down 2 very sweet boys who got up the nerve to ask. I knew that by saying yes, I would be saying yes, I like you back, feel free to put the moves on me...which I absolutely was not going to say or do that.
 
4.  None of my single girl friends wanted to go as a group, some were too embarrassed not to have dates, others were too cool to go.

I do not regret missing my senior prom, I don't think it would have had the magic the others had for me. Prom wouldn't have been the same without John.

Do you remember you prom?

Do tell, I'd love to hear about it.

How I see it: Joy Dare

I am a voyeur when it comes to twitter, unless it comes to insta*gram, cause that asks if you want to share on twitter. I mostly follow celebs, both on TV and in blogland. You know the gals that have a gazillion readers because they suck us in with a post that makes us think she's talking directing to us. She has humor, grace, life experience she candidly shares...
This morning I was reading tweets when Gussy mentioned this post:
She talks about being a friend and gives us 4 ways to be a better friend...
I lost my bestie to jealousy. It was one of the most painful things I've ever endured. It open the door to depression, which sucked me in whole. Depression chewed me up into bite size pieces and I was left trying to put myself back together.
I didn't do it alone. I had my sweet Hubby, who was my fiance' at the time an I found Jesus. But I felt alone. Where were the women? I have been let down so many times by the women in my life.
Achingly alone.
I started going to bible study, and then a group of women came into my life and it.was.magic. Then the study ended, schedules changed and life went on. When we do get together it's wonderful. Why do we wait so long?
I have a daughter, and I don't ever want her to feel alone. I want to model good relationships for her. But the truth is women scare me. I have been hurt by them in the past. I've lost my bestie every time I've ever allowed myself to have a bestie.
I trust too easily, love to hard, care too much...I thought that was how it is suppose to be.
Family is something you "get what you get and don't throw a fit", friends are the family you get to choose...
Women can be so cruel, so callus with their words to one another. We can be so indifferent. Busy.
Really? life is so busy that you'd rather live it without a pact of wild rabid God-fearing women having your back?
Think about what stirs you. Think about what it means to YOU to have that support...now think about who you have let slip because busy is as busy does.

Just this week I had to cancel a "date". Because the weather around here was nasty. I had been looking forward to it, and when the day passed I shrugged my shoulders and gave myself an "oh well." busy is as busy does...
No. Not good enough. That date matters. That woman matters to me.
Julie, you matter. We are going to have our shamrock sh-date!
Tracy, Sarah, Wendie, Jody, Molly it has been way too long. I love you. Lets get together, hug, laugh, share...

On the link I posted earlier there was a JOY DARE (meant for January, but I just found it so I'm doing it now)
1.) 3 Things about yourself you are grateful for:

My sensitive heart, my determination, my desire to understand.

2.) A gift outside, inside, on a plate.

winter's whiteness, a comfy couch to read, a slice of watermelon so sweet it brings summer inside when all you see is winter's white...

3) 3 lines you overheard that were graces.

(Butter) My mom is my hero, because she cooks good meals for us...(school project)
(Mother-in-law) "You always put so much thought into the gifts you give." (Christmas time)
You is kind, you is smart and you is important (the Help)

That last one should be someone we women say over and over and over again to ourselves and each other!
Yes, each on of us is important.
I will continue my Joy Dare this month...it's the month I was born, and is usually the hardest month for me...Join me...I DARE you.

What is it about red heads?

Hi I'm Sara and I love redheads.
When I was 3 or 4 I had a crush on this boy His name was Nick Peterson and our parents were friends. Nick had strawberry blond hair, like I did. I thought I'd marry Nick Peterson.
When I was in third grade My best friend Kim had red hair.
In seventh grade my best friend Ginny, had you guessed it red hair. This beautiful dark auburn hair.
My first real job I met a gal named Trista, and we became best friends. She of course had red hair!
I can't tell you why it is that I am drawn to redheads. Maybe it's their fiery personalities or their fierce way of loving.
One of my dear RL friends introduced me to the blog: The Real Life of a Redhead.
Umm, yeah. Just try and keep me away.
Only when I started reading Miss Jill, she was going through something no woman should ever have to. What struck me most about her was how through unimaginable pain, she clung to God. With each post she wrote I struggled to come up with something to say. My heart ached for her and her family, but the words just wouldn't come.
In this land of Blog, we all are touched by the stories we read, and I think that we all want to do our best to lift those up when they are hurting, and that is hard when we don't personally know them or are unsure how our words will come across to them, when they can't see our eyes when we say them.
I wanted to tell Jill I cared, I wanted to reach out and touch her and tell her I was there listening, praying for her sweet son.
Jill wrote a very raw and emotional post about Joshua's last day here. I was struck by how much pain was in her memories, I was overcome with this feeling, this truth I guess. I needed to share that with her and yet I was afraid, I was very frighten that she may not want to hear what I had to say, what if my comment hurt her, what if it only made her memory more painful. Then I thought to myself would this be something I would want to hear? Is this lifting her up? is it encouraging?
The answer to all was yes.
But I still felt like "she doesn't know me! Who I am to just say this."
We like to say we are authentic, transparent in our blogging, I certainly feel I am.
I sent my comment and knew that she would need to approve it before it would ever be visible.
I came down to check my email later in the day and what I saw in my in box made me nervous. It was from The real life of a redhead. I opened it and read it and cried. What felt so simple and obvious and yet scary to say...she said meant more to her then I would ever know.
Today as I was reading through blogland I saw her post.
I am extremely humbled. I have a hard time being acknowledged. I like being on the sideline cheering, if someone asks for me to speak about something I'm passionate about I will without hesitation. I was afraid of how my words would impact her, I was afraid that my heart was overstepping, I was afraid God got me wrong. I should have stayed a redhead, because there is this fiery, fierceness in me too that needs to acknowledge the truth when I see it, even when that means the pinprick of conviction. (I'm talking about myself here) See I've been ignoring some pride issues. I'll do a post on that later.
I am humbled that words I've shared meant so much, and I know it is only because for out of the over-flow of the heart the mouth speaks Luke 6:45