Last year...

Last year at this time I was so filled with worry, that I barely had time to enjoy the last days of school.
Last year at this time I was rubbing my knees raw in prayer for this family.
Last year at this time I was praying unemployment wouldn't last long for my husband.
Last year at this time I was coming to terms with loosing our house, both being angry at the bank for not working with us to stay and hopeful they would except the offer we received to short sell before the sheriff auction. Thinking about this brings back feelings of disgust, humility, hope...FAITH.
God had to have a plan for us.
Last year at this time we were in the storm of our lives, and I can barely remember the kids school year ending...
I was wrapped up in keeping it together, when every fiber of my being wanted to kick and scream and be mad at God.
It was a daily struggle for me. I didn't feel like I could breathe for months. June was especially bad, this time last year.
We have all grown. Things have changed, bitterness has turned to joy.
The kids miss the house; it was the only one they knew. The dog misses the house, and her yard to protect! The cat misses the freedom of her quiet street. Rob and I don't miss it at all. For us it was always a temporary home, a place "for now" until we could build our forever home. When I used to think of that house I saw the things I wanted to change, the things I hated and wanted updated.
When I reflect back on the house now, I still feel those things, but I see it as the place we built our family. Slowly the memories are coming back to me. The peony bushes I re-planted when we moved in. The decorating of the kids rooms. The beautiful paint color we painted just before moving in. Redoing the kitchen floor just Rob and I. The new front door and windows we had installed to protect us from the cold winters. Cutting the grass on our riding lawn mover. Trick or Treating in our neighborhood and all the little old people so excited to see the kids that they would just dump the candy in the buckets, not caring that we would be saying "Just one! Just one!"
Riding our bikes on the path, the weather sirens testing every month and the dog singing along!
The cursing of weeds in the spring/summer and leaves in the fall! The way my cabinets were and where everything was stashed in them. The stormy nights we cuddled up downstairs in our basement together. The Christmas', oh the Chirstmas' we shared in that house. How there was no fireplace, so the stockings were hung on the stair railings instead. The joy I felt when anything was replaced: a light fixture, a ceiling fan, a new towel bar! The work that went into taking that wallpaper down! Oh, how I hated the wallpaper!
I huge garage(s). We had 2 two-car garages, one behind the other. You have no idea how grand this was!!!!!
We now have a "basic" 2 car garage and only 1 car! Yet there never seems to be enough room...gee, I wonder why that is? wink wink
I can see the growth in my kids. We did everything we could to shield them from the drama and concern we had at the time. We spoke only in whispers in the dark of night. We told them things only when it was time to tell them. Both were nervous about switching schools, and sad. The pool at the new place helped cope!
We prayed for our kids to transition smoothly, and they did. They made friends and had the best teachers. Butter needed a bit more help with her reading, she doesn't like it, and these teachers were ON IT! She loves them, and for them she worked really hard, she still doesn't like to read, but she knows she has to work at it. I am so proud of both of them, they still don't know how desperate we were at this time last year. I am grateful that my God was there for me, I can't imagine not having hope, not knowing His promises.
I am so ready to say goodbye to last year and move on.
Today I am cherishing how far we've come and peacefully waiting for His instructions for our future.

Some things never Change or My birthday post!

I woke up this morning completely oblivious to what day it was. I got up, shuffled to the kitchen to make my morning cup of coffee. The kids greeted me as usual with descriptions of the art work they quietly made while I was still hibernating in my room with cozy blankets and snoring pets.

Nina said something about not being dressed pretty, and I ignored it, because I'm used to her pairing skin tight leggings with shirts that are defiantly not long enough to cover those skin tight leggings. Maybe I'm a wee bit old fashion, but I'm not found of the leggings. I know they rock the comfort scale, but they should really be paired with a dress. I took a few hits sips of coffee and suddenly it dawned on me. It's my birthday!

My 37th to be exact. Which is a little scary and thrilling all at the same time.

And I've realized some things haven't changed.

This is me on my first birthday. I have this exact smile on today!

 I was a good mommy, kept my babes clean and fed and never took any lip or they faced a good scolding and a time out. What has changed is I no longed throw the babies. Ahem, good thing I learned that! (another thing you can't hear, is I am actually "yelling" at my sister to give me back the bottle it's my baby! and right after this pic was taken I took the baby and threw it down because she wouldn't let me feed it.) I'm still protective of my "babies."

I love music and can get lost in the moment of a song.

 I love picnics on sunny afternoons with those I love and no bugs.

I've posted this photo before, and it's still relevant, I am not a morning person.

 My best friend is the boy I wanted to marry. I married my best friend. (This is Nick P. I was going to marry him, we had it all planned, then they went and moved. This began my long 23 year search my a new best friend to marry...) I should try to find him on facebook, I would if he has a daughter named Sara?

 Oh, this picture makes me LAUGH! I love to talk on the phone, and not the cell phone, it drives me crazy when the call drops! I was such a lady even back then, legs crossed, sipping my coke talking about Strawberry shortcake and Nick P.

 We celebrated on Saturday at Osaka. It was a lot of fun.

 Maybe a little too much... I did after all have a few of these.

MMM, something pink and fruity!

Happy people

So I've decided I'm not a happy person.
I say that because happy people don't see offense all around them.
I was waiting at the grocery store for Hubby to run in and buy some milk, while waiting I saw:

• more then a few people left there carts where ever they wanted, even if that meant walking 5 more steps to a cart corral.
• one person took up 2 spots because of laziness or lack of driving skills.
• 3 cars not giving pedestrians the right of way.
• One woman yanking her kid's arm.
• One person that brought their dog, only to leave it in the car so it could bark the entire time. (It was there when I got there and still there when I left 12 minutes later.)
• Several people drop their (cigarette) butts and leave them to continue smoking. GRRRRRRRRR

See Happy people would say things like:

• "Oh look those carts are so pretty littered all over the parking lot, I have a reason to park far out in the lot and get a nice walk in."
• "What a beautiful car, I can see why it doesn't have any dings, maybe I should take up to spots. I'd have less dents."
• "I love to wave at the people as I speed on by."
• "Nothing like a good old stretch ah Jr.?"
• "OH Sparky just loves shopping!"
• (Nope sorry I can't think of one thing happy people could say about litter)

I have an issue with entitlement. I have issues with people who lack common sense and courtesy. Is my plank sticking too far out there, because I would LOVE to crack some of these people WITH IT as I walk past them. Isn't that really what it's for??? They have a speck and I have a plank so the speck needs to be CORRECTed.

I LIKE IT! (just came up with that, don't steal it.)

Happy people are too busy being happy about the world and looking through their rose colored glasses. Actually I think all the smiling has slanted they're eyes and they can't SEE clearly. Which, having a plank in the eye doesn't help much either, but it does SHARPEN the sight in the other eye...

In which case I'm glad I'm not happy, I would hate to not recognize heaven when I get there because I didn't think there was anything wrong with the first place!

Thanks I'll just not be a happy person...